Stop Feeling Like a Failure, Always Feel Like a Winner!

If you feel like you are lost or falling behind, then one of the quickest ways to get back on track is to get a clear vision of where you want to be.

By having a point of reference, it means you have something to keep you accountable to and a point to work towards. Whether that’s getting married, buying a house or getting promoted at work.

Take a piece of paper and write down what it is you want to achieve and be in the next year and then break it down into smaller monthly goals.

Then take all of that and condense it into a one to two word sentence which will become your vision statement.

What this does is help you have an idea of the bigger picture but takes the overwhelm out of it because you are able to just focus on one step at a time.

But before I tell you the next 7 steps I will say this, some of the men I have worked with have been big shot entrepreneurs, owning flashy cars and nice houses, but have still felt like they were failing because they couldn’t find the right woman.

Other men I have worked with have had the girl, but have felt unfilled in their purpose. You don’t have to have one or the other, I believe you can have both and that’s why I want to teach you how to do that right now.

They say that we become a product of our environment or "if you show me who your friends are then I’ll show you who you’ll become".

Whether we want to or not, we are all easily influenced by the people we surround ourselves with. And right now, it’s time to do an audit of who you hang out with.

The best questions to ask yourself when it comes to your circle are:

• Do I want to become like one of them?
• Do I feel encouraged and energised by them?
• Do they push me to be a better version of myself?
• Am I growing when I am with them?

If you answer No to any one of these then it’s time to find yourself a new tribe. As men, you are going to be naturally competitive, so surround yourself with people who cause you to want to succeed, rather than settling for mediocrity.

When you become too focused on the future you often forget just how far you’ve come. It’s great to be hungry for more, but it shouldn’t be at the expense of your peace or relationships.

If you are a high achiever then chances are you will always be pushing for the next, and one of the exercises I get my male clients to do is to make an accomplishment board to put next to their vision statement like what I suggested in point 10.

This board should have visual or written evidence of what you HAVE done, so that you can also remember that you are progressing and not failing.

Your thoughts have the power to destroy or build your world up. How? Simply because whatever we think we then speak and act out of, which produce our patterns which then form our lives.

If you want to start feeling like you are succeeding, whether you believe it or not, you have to start taking control of your thought process.

Science says it takes 21 days for a new habit to form in your brain, so all you need to do is monitor your thoughts for 3 weeks and correct them every time they start to go off course.

The best way is to keep a journal or have some good friends keep you accountable to your attitude.

If you go to the gym already then, it’s time to push harder and set new goals to shock your muscles into new growth. If you don’t do exercise then it’s time to join a gym or fitness sport.

Not only does this increase your testosterone and endorphins which lifts your mood but it also gives you energy and puts you in an environment of people who are dedicated to getting results.

Sometimes feeling better about yourself and boosting your confidence can come down to just getting a make-over. If you have no idea about style then go and hire someone or watch some of our videos on how to dress and groom properly like: "15 things men wear that women love".

In the first 2 mins of meeting a woman she will be working out if she is attracted to you or not and that initial attraction will be based off how you look and hold yourself.

So, do yourself a favour and invest the time, energy and money into enhancing how you look so that you can feel more confident and get a better reaction.

If you really want to shock your brain into thinking you are a thriving alpha male, then set yourself a 30-day challenge and focus on completing it. Whether this is saving a certain amount of money, lifting a certain amount of weight, running a race, quitting sugar or alcohol, choose something that interests but challenges you.

And when you think about it focusing on 1 month out of 12 is nothing but can make a huge difference to the rest of the year, so don’t delay and at the end of this blog choose your challenge and put it in the comments below so we can all celebrate and cheer you on!