Master Relationship Management for Lasting Happiness

Here, in this discussion, we shall focus on couple relationships today.

In couple relationships, both need to be real. Accept your partner as he/she is. Remember, every two persons are different from each other. We must accept that; we cannot get a carbon copy of myself; this means my partner will be different from me. His/her behavior, liking, and disliking will be different from mine. I need to accept him/her the way he/she is. If we try to change our partner the way we want, it often creates conflict. The worst happens when both try to change each other. If you wish to, instead of bringing change into your partner, why don’t you change yourself? You will find it is not easy. This means, when we try to change our partner, it will be equally difficult for him/her.

Appreciate someone for any good thing. Appreciation is one key to sustain the relationship. Say, “Thank you.” There is no better way to maintain a smooth relationship than to show gratitude to your partner. Also, both the partners must have respect for each other. Respect is one of the critical ingredients for a successful relationship. 

Ideally, a couple should be the best friend of each other. This means that they should share their feeling. If I don’t like something, I must tell the same to my partner. If we expect that my partner will understand it automatically – trust me, that does not happen. My partner is a human, not God, or does not have a superpower, meaning, if I don’t express my feeling, how will he/she understand that I felt terrible because of some behavior or words? Communicate with your partner in the way he/she wants to be communicated. Don’t try to impose your style of communication with him/her. Similarly, tell your partner how you want to be communicated! Don’t expect that your partner must know that!!

Remember, we all are human; we are prone to make mistakes. There is nothing wrong if we make a mistake, but if my mistake hurts my partner or have an impact on her/him, then don’t hesitate to say “Sorry” and while saying “Sorry” please do mean it. If there is any miscommunication/argument, be the first person to say, “Sorry,” don’t bring the ego in front of you. Don’t think – “Why shall I say sorry, first? She/he also had hurt me – so the other person must say sorry to me first”. This only creates distance – does not solve the issue. What is worst is – once the gap is created, with the next occurrence, the distance will only increase, and in no time, then it will be so much that it will almost be impossible to bridge the gap! Don’t go to that extent, please.

Your partner will come to know about it, and we cannot hide the truth. It will be worst if your partner hears or come to know about the incident from someone else. For example, – you were in a relationship earlier, which did not go till marriage, and you hide that information from your current partner. Will she/he be thrilled if she/he comes to know about it from someone else or some other means? Now, you may say – I love my partner too much, and I fear that, if I disclose, about my earlier relationship – my partner will leave me. Here, I have two points to make:

1. If your partner loves you – then eventually, she/he will have more respect for you if you share the truth at the beginning. Your partner, who loves you, will not leave you.
2. What will happen if your partner comes to know about the relationship from someone else after some time (days/months/years)? That will be even more hurting!

What is worst – We will be opening an avenue to be blackmailed by someone else because you hid such vital information.

So, what will be better? I am sure; you will agree that – keeping secrets is not a real good option.